When my son was first born, he was as bald as they come. Deciding on whether to grow his non-existent hair until age three, as is the Jewish custom in many circles, was not something I was thinking about. In fact, those early weeks, I wasn’t thinking much about anything except getting more sleep! However, as months went by and my son’s hair started to fill in, my husband and I started to discuss whether we would grow his hair until age three. I was opposed to it, merely for aesthetic reasons, I simply didn’t like the way ponytails and clips looked on little boys, and always having to explain to strangers how your “cute little girl” was actually a boy. However when my husband found out it was my family’s custom to grow the hair until age three, the discussion was essentially over. I figured once I was going to follow this custom at least let me learn more about it.
So I decided to do some research. The custom of “upsherin” as it is traditionally called is first mentioned in the book “Sha’ar haKavanot” by the famed Kabbalist R’ Chaim Vital, but the origin is in Biblical verses. In many places throughout the Bible and prophetic writings man is likened to a tree.
“A person is like the tree of a field” (Deut. 20:19).
“For as the days of a tree, shall be the days of my people” (Isaiah 65:22).
“Blessed is the man who trusts in the Lord, for then the Lord will be his security. He will be like a tree planted near water…whose foliage is evergreen…and will not stop producing fruit” (Jeremiah 17:8).
And lastly, a similar idea of that expressed by Jeremiah appears in the first chapter of Psalms where the righteous man who always desires closeness to God and His Torah, is compared to a “tree planted alongside brooks of water, that yield its fruit in its season, and whose leaf never withers; and everything he does shall succeed.”
Why all these scriptural comparisons between man and trees?
Essentially in order for both man and trees to survive in this world they rely on the four basic elements: soil, water, air and fire. Besides the obvious literal understanding of the necessities of these elements to man, one can also understand them on a metaphorical level. Soil is man’s roots, his supportive home upbringing that anchors him to family and a strong moral consciousness, giving him the fortitude to withstand all the current winds of change and modernity that will challenge him throughout life. Water is Torah, giving life and vitality to the spiritually thirsty and to lives arid of meaning. Air, breath, is the spirit of God each human has within him. And fire, or warmth, comes from the community so essential to living a fulfilled Torah life. At the core, our needs are not that much different than trees.
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